Saturday, May 31, 2008

miss home so much... i miss my bro fast forwarding the hong kong series we were watching..
i miss the quarrel i had with my bro, i miss my dog which like to act cute when he wants to eat...
i miss my house.. i miss the time i spent with mom and dad... i miss.... everything in my house..

Friday, May 30, 2008

i went out with mom juz now.. to shop around and walked around.

this morning, dad quarrelled with my bro, sheng. hmm, i was sleeping by then, and heard he roared at my bro still snoring on his bed as he was late to skol. yea, no wonder dad cant stand him. then, my bro was darn angry and after skol, he called mom and said that he's not coming home tonite. i can understand how he feels... coz that's the way i responded last time when i quarrelled with dad on the phone in Singapore.

then, mom and i advised him to think twice as dad will hav a high probability to dare him not to come home for the rest of his life (my dad is sort of conservative and very strict ==")
in the end, my bro made up his mind and came home before dad finds out.lol

then, on the way back, i told mom that dad really prefer sons than daughter. well, it was true (mom told me) and the situation was worst when i was young, he doesnt giv a damn on my presence. i was darn hurt when i heard that from my mom. i wanted to cry and feel so unloved. and am really angry that my bros never cherrish the attention and privellege they have. when they hav such a good chance and opportunity, they never realize them and let it go easily. sigh.. i think this is wat we call the human nature...

i wanted to cry when i heard that, but i cant. i cant blame anyone as i am a very fortunate compared to any other ppl. i need to prove to dad that a daughter is not as bad as a son. more need to be done to mend the stranded ties between my dad and the four of us.. perhaps, this is the reason why i'm so family oriented and why i love them so much.

when u dont own something, u will cherish and treasure it more.......

Thursday, May 29, 2008

tonight will be going back singapore. hmm... i'm watching hong kong series with my bro while blogging at the same time. haha... i dunno wat to do. anyone has any good suggestion??

to be continued...

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

today, i had a talk with my grandma, grandpa and my aunt. from the conversation, i was told that i was actually brought up by my grandma until i entered kindergarden and mom paid RM250/month for grandma to take care of me.

suddenly, i felt so unloved by my parents when grandma told me that my parents dint even come back to see me during chinese new year where all the family members shld gather together. was quite sad when i heard bout such things. then they told me tat now i am now very fortunate and shld be thankful of what they hav given me. i agreed with them to a certain extent bcoz of my dad preferences to a son in the past.

except my youngest bro, three of us were nanny by my grandma and not even my cousins. i juz feel very weird. is it tat my mom dunno how to handle children or my parents both very tired of taking care of us??



hmm.... it's quite ironic to tell myself that i was so unloved by them when i was small and now, they treat me as if they owe me lots. i do cherish whatever they have done for me, but still i need to show them that it is a bless to have a daughter, it is something special to them and it is something they would miss if they dint make me out. (haha.. i sound stupid here.. sorry)



yea.. this hols back to Ipoh is quite a meaningful one. looking forward for tml =)

below are some pics taken during my supper in a Japanese Restaurant. the chef is a friend of my mom for more than 20years. lol... long story man...



my favourite-- dragon roll





idako... yummy =)


nice salad... i forgot its name.. sorry...


hahahahaha... it's the premier sashimi... i'm coming!!!!!!! yummy
i actually wanted to update my post with pics... but i dunno how to function my house's laptop..lol..

so, to be continued..

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

back in Ipoh!!!!!woot*woot*

this morning arrived at 5plus... rargh... Dimsum havent open yet. so, hav to wait till 6am.. hahahaha... yea..

later, i had my 2nd round breakfast with daddy at about 9am. then as usual, he took us to his farm cum garden. haha.. i dunno how to describe the place.. daddy showed me his plantation which i had previously claimed that it would not be successful.

hmm... now going for late lunch.. lol.. c ya..

Monday, May 26, 2008

i read some articles.. hmm.. it's very true among women.. yea, it's about the enjoyment of being single. so, below are some extracts from the article:

"In some ways, this is a generation of women who are saying,"if it's not great, i dont want it. i can have a great life in this modern world, where there are equals rights for women, great jobs and lots of opportunities." You dont need a man to protect you, u dont need a man to make an impact in life and to do what u want to do," and staying with someone for the sake of it isnt juzt a waste of time, it could also be brick-walling future opportunities.

Dating myself taught me lots of thing- what i love doing,who my good friends really are and what is important to me.....

a real relationship, whether it's with a friend or a lover, is about finding someone who brings out the best in u, enjoys the best in u and loves u for the things that u love.

so, hope u like it =)

Saturday, May 24, 2008

juz finished watching Ice Princess. it's a nice movie and i'll regret if i dint watch it. the movie is inspiring and has emphasised the importance of a mother making an effort to understand their children. the movie also remind me of my friends. i juz realize all my friends i made in Singapore are so temporary. it never last nor they are ur good friends. it's juz the typical "hi & bye" friends. me kinda tired making new friends. i juz want a long lasting friend, who can hang out with, study together, fool around and doing stupid things together. but it juz seems so IMPOSSSIBLE!!!!! so, everytime, i juz try imagine wat if zong, lee, teng were here. i think we'll sure gone nuts and crazy. i juz miss those days when we hang out so often and study together. i want to hav that life back. people around me are so superficial. i dont want this kind of friends. arent them tired of faking or pretending who they arent???!!! it's easy to make friends, but its hard to keep a friend. especially when u r in a good mood or watever, everyone seems so familiar to u. but when u need them, they are like strangers whom u dare not to approach bcoz u're afraid and are diffident. i dunno whether coming to singapore, knowing so many friends is a good thing or a bad one. when u go on the street, u can easily bump into someone u know, and even some that they know u but u dont know them.. but for sure, all these so called perpetually short-term "friendship" is not worthwhile to put into ur heart.. it'll juz make u emo and sad and make u question urself "why they treat me like this? did i have done anything offensive or intruding??" why make urself so unworthy when these people take ur care and friendship for granted??

i must start identifying my friends and hopefully these identified friends dont take "what i give" for granted and really cherrish them.

okok... am going to take a nap soon.

Thursday, May 22, 2008

exam juz ended.. yea.. am really relieve now.. coz my two worst subject has finally accomplished. whiew~ hmm... room in a mess now.. really wish my maid were here now... i really wanna juz hackcare bout the books and piles of notes scattering the floor!!!! wth... my mom sure scold me if she sees this.lol. or perhaps, if i see this happen in my room back in msia, i've already scolded my maid.. haha..

so, me kind of planned out my hols =)
1) conquer rollerblade
2) increase my fitness level & tone up my body
3) prepare mid year exam
4) bike hike - 120km
5) clubbing (juz for fun)
6) explore around Singapore for sth interest.. perhaps with someone with the same interest


yea.. those are my plan. hopefully i can complete them and most importantly.. is point 2 and 3. die die must complete these 2 aim!!!!!!!!!!

okok.. later me going to get my knee guard for roller blade. lol

bye~

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

tml mid year exam commencing.. hmm.. i'm out of my mind.. attempting to do weird stuff when exam is around the corner.. wth..

now, mind full of china's policy and her economic development. sian~ i like the subject alot, but i juz hate the exam..

btw, my youngest bro's bdae coming soon... it's on 25th May. dont think can celebrate his bdae in msia. sigh.. i sacrifice and missed lots of family moment. smetimes, i cant even recall the feeling of happiness with family. i think i'm really bad..

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

hmm... i feel like a toy and hate the feeling..
ok, 不要爽不爽就采我,因为我不是你的玩具!
我只要当一个真心的朋友,那不是你缺乏的吗?
我可以答应你的知己,但我不会做你的娱乐道具。

Monday, May 19, 2008

suddenly, i hate true yoga so much... feel so cheated..
okok.. i cant hate sth out of sudden.. there's always a reason.. lol.. but me dont feel like sharing the reason.. rargh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

never ever make a commitment.. i do learned a lesson from True Yoga.. coz when u promised to commit sth.. u need to bear the full responsibility.. sigh.. no choice now, but to continue my commitment.. RARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate true yoga.. sian~

Friday, May 16, 2008

after chatting with Neil last night, i'm now totally obssesed with desserts. and coincidently, i found a blog which really intrigue me.. lol. coz there are lots of cakes and sweets stuff... lol. yea, the following are some of the pic i took from her blog. (pray she dont mind..^^)


tangy tarte au citron from Pain du Sucre











my...my.. i wish i own them all...


all taken from Notes by Naive



feel like eating dessert... anyone??
hmm... juz finished Mr Pang remedial. today, we discussed about Confucianism and Lao Tze teachings. quite a tedious topic. then there's another passage about "What is life?"
when encounter such passage, and during the discussion, a sudden though stroke my mind:"Why are we here? what are we here for?" i thought the questions were insane and no matter how hard i squeeze my brain, there wont be an answer, and perhaps, there'll never be one definite answer.
with all the development and progress we have achieved, scietifically, it has failed to adress the the most fundamental and yet common statement-- existence of life.

"To see a World in a grain of Sand,
And a Heaven in a Wild flower,
Hold Infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour."

by William Blake

sometimes, it's quite worthwhile to ponder about why life exists and what is the significance. but dont get too indulge in it, coz u'll never get the answer that will satisfy as what goes around comes back around.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

yay... tml is friday and three more days to Sunday!!!! muahahaha...
today, me feel so lazy to wake up... rargh... why cant the time stop for me to sleep more???!!! sian diao~ =.="

i went to library after having breakfast with my classmates in the canteen. read newspaper... but the main point is that i was told or rather "ordered" to put the newspaper back into the clip. then i'm like.... wth... when i took the newspaper, it was lying there on the rack... so, i juz put back the way it was.. the 2 old hag looked at me with their evil eyes and insisted me to do it. i hav no choice.. so, i did it with an attitude.. (i cant help it.. coz i needa rush to lesson while the old hags sitting down there chit chatting.. fXXk la!!!!!!) then walked away with venom spitted onto them... xp

yea, then today we had our final touch rugby games session durin PE. hmm... i totally have no idea wat touch rugby game is about. but as the game went on, i'm kinda get the gist of what it is and how to play... touch rugby... hmm.. i would say it is a really enjoyable game to have.. no regret =)

however, it is quite a rough game... me got hit by Joshua.. luckily he pulled me back and reduced my impact of hitting the ground.. if not... i think i'll..... yea, and Marie.. u hit my... (wth =.=") sian, cant take revenge... hehehe... but there will be a chance.... muahahahahaha...

suppose i planned to go night study coz derrick hoi is there... but.. needa do mr. pang essay outline... sigh....

okok... back to work liao...

later will hav subway for supper ... hehe...

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

today has been a tiring day for me...
lesson ended at 4pm.. later went to tuition.. and juz settle down...
feel like sleeping.. but there CSE report and Mr. Pang Essay outline...
i hate life with so many homework... but yet, these are the things that aid my studies... wth...

i keep telling myself:"hang on... u're almost there..." hopefully, those of u who need motivation, remember to encourage urself and never give up... coz u never noe when u're almost there...

jiayou, everyone...

Sunday, May 11, 2008

juz came back from Hwa Chong Choir concert =)
hmm... not a bad one... especially when they sung Angel and Stand by Me.


after that, we took pics... haha...




After the concert...




on the way to raffles place mrt-- outside view of Fullerton.. nice man..





nice and romantic place....







stupid hoekit, can u pls pose properly???!!!



cute "couple"...kekekekeke...,




sei fei hing spoiled the whole pic...


before i left... the last pic we took in mac..look at them... (vomit.. haha... =p)
yeap... juz came back from Starbucks... sadly, i dint meet my expectations =(

anyway, the expectation was not a bad one.. hehe... (giggling in the heart... =p)



btw, this is the main thing i want to post... Leng Shiew, pls take note.. muahahahaha.. (evil laugh..)
PIG (>@<)
i hope this "surprise" u!! haha... =p bleag!

i was darn hungry at 3plus.. and juz wanna eat Jap food... so, i... hehe.. doesnt it looks yummy..

Saturday, May 10, 2008

okok... juz now was not a really nice blog where it suppose to be in this fine, refreshing, peaceful Sunday morning =)



this morning, we planned to play tennis... but the court is wet.. so, we have to cancel our plan.. sigh... nvm.. coz..

It's a BEAUTIFUL SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Mother's Day!!!

mom, i know i cant do much today... hopefully, u'll have a lovely Mother's Day with ur sons in Ipoh!!!!!
pa, take care... dont fall sick anymore... health is more important then time and money...

it is so beautiful, until the sun..... the sun is so soft and gentle... (for heaven sake, i cant describe... so, juz imagine urself... =p) hmm... if ur brain cant imagine them, juz scroll down to see the pic i've taken this morning =)



hmm... this is where i normally read newspaper... this morning is juz a bless to hav sat down here =)



u can see the rain water scattered on the tar road... cooling morning heh... *^^*


i juz randomly too this pic since i could not sit on it...><
nice??



so yea... this is the morning i have... hope u hav a nice one too =)

p.s.: mommy, hav u guys went to make appointment for health check up????!!!! dont make me nag again.... ><
i dint update my blog last night... due to poor connection.. thanks to M1.. rargh.... if u don wish to encounter the same thing as I did, never sign up for M1 mobile broadband 1800plan... seriously, it really sucks... (note that i'm not the only one comment on its poor connections!! all my friends who signed up this plan got cheated) if u ask me which one is the best and which i'm using now, i would say Singtel. i'm using my friend's one who has signed up Singtel mobile broadband. it is stable, fast at a reasonable speed.... and i like it *^^*

so yea, this is what i shld update last night...
i went to Bishan to get my brunch at Subway. along the way, i saw some people queuing in front of a cupboard, where it supposed to distribute free tabloid "weekend newpaper"(if i'm not wrong).. ok, i don really care about it at 1st. so, i continue my way to Subway ^^
after i bought my subway melt plus a oatmeal raisins cookie(my favourite =)), i saw the same crowd, but this time they no longer in the queuing position, coz they got what they want. i tot... wow... these people really kiasu eh...queue so early for newspaper...hmm... not bad., not bad.. very enthu in reading huh... but............................................ wait, i saw a family took 5 copies.. (suppose, i presume each of their family member queued for one), an old man(around 70plus) eyes barely read the small letters from the tabloid, queued for the tabloid and later folded it and put into his paperbag, with lots of old tabloids to sell it and then recycle... when i saw it, i'm like "wat the helllllllllllllllll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

omg... i juz dont understand how these people actually think.kiasu is not wrong, but in someway, kiasu really unglam.... it's really sad and disturb to see something like this.... sigh... what to do.. this is the way the world works... where in the 3rd world, people cant even hav the chance to hold a fine piece of paper, and here are we, one family took 5 copies (maybe for their convenient to read...><) and uncle took the copy juz for the sake of recycle without reading them...
(hmm... if the above u find them offensive, i apologize 1st.. i hope u wont be agitated or... afterall, it's juz my opinion.. am really greatful for u guys understanding )

ok, case cloz...

Friday, May 09, 2008

hmm.... it's Saturday morning....finally, this morning was raining heavily followed by thunders. it is a nice morning... cooling and refreshing.. a nice moment to sit down alone in the room... to study.. hehe... today will be a study day for me!!! as tml will me my study day plus concert day plus ..... (hehe... not going to tell u guys...) tomorrow is SUNDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahahahaha.. my long awaited day finally arriving in less than 24 hours. hohohoho... juz make me so excited when think about it.

okok... i feel like eating Subway now... hungry man...

bye... *^^*
juz finished tennis around 7.30pm with Kimfay and yihui. it was a nice one though we spent most of the time chasing the tennis balls. haha.. (u cant blame us for both of us are beginners!>.<)

we borrowed the tennis racquet and balls from from Terence and Michael. yeap.. at 1st, we dont even know how to serve the balls. we end up hitting the balls in all directions. but soon, we got the gist of it and started hitting the ball back. yay!!!! finally there's improvement!

but, improvement aint the best, always. coz when we got to hit the ball, the ball can fly so high (due to our poor control of power) and flew off the court. worst, we cant get access to the other areas where the balls flew to becoz the gate was locked!!! sian diao~
1st ball flew over.... then, 2nd ball..... waliao... really sian diao eh... wth.. left one ball... and what if this last ball.... plus the balls are not our!! die die die die die...dia liao... x_x

in the end, yihui, fimfay and me planned to walked all the way, through the front gate of skol to get the ball which is at the back of the skol. wah.... when we imagine the distance we need to travel.. we sparked off a brilliant idea- climb over the gate. yes, this is the only way!

eventually, kimfay climbed over the gate with me and yihui concerned for her safety. at last, she managed to climb over and "retrived" our "lost" ball!!!! hooray, kimfay, u rock man! damn proud of u.hehe...

yeap, we continued our game until 7.30pm...

and i made Ribena... SHIOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! esp after sport... =)

okie... me needa study adi.. Sian~ sigh... no choice...

p.s.: to know more about Kimfay, go to "my life sweetener" on the left side of my blog page. she's my junior from 1T24 =)

Thursday, May 08, 2008

today is James' bdae!!!! happi bdae, Jam Jam.. we celebrated after Prize Award Ceremony in the canteen. i think Daryl planned it on purpose to have the celebration at the "peak" hour of canteen... then, we sung the song (but i think we r shouting the song instead.. wth =.=") haha.. anyway, it was an awesome celebration!!!

the bdae cake bought at St. Levens, takashimaya basement (i hope i dint spell it wrongly, correct me if i am =) thanks)


the cake was superb.. trust me.. price was reasonable and is a lot better than "Bengawan Solo"...

to James...: happy sweet 18 and may ur dream and DESIRE for "uh-hum" will come true =) oh, and all the best for t24 in the coming A level!!!!

the bdae boy-- James



T24 rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kwek, James, Yu (n_n)

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

today, was another tiring day, yet happy day =)

GP clinic (specially cater to poor GP students like me) today gave us some briefing on Criterion. and taught us how to access them. it serves to correct our grammatical error..and it is a quite good learning website area for us.. ^^ and the skol has spent 3000 on us. i really appreciate it lots. thanks! yeap, i also requested Mr. Hoi to transfer me to his tutorials=) and luckily, he agreed!!! yay.... i'm looking forward to his lesson ^^*


today, my cca organized singing competition. it was not a bad one after all. after the competition ended, we have some refreshments and at the same time, we celebrated Lynn's bdae! Lynn's Bdae cake-- with her favourite Melody


and the most funny part was that Marie joined the celebration.. haha.. it was like our CCA event, marie skived her FSV, and came to the celebration bcoz of the-- FOOD. haha.. she was damn cute la. anyway, i was happy that she claimed that today was her best CCA day after Jon left. wth... haha.. anyway, really hav great time with her!
cute marie...

p.s.: Li Hui... u miss sth... muahahahahahahaha..

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

another day again... hmm... today dint really slack around.. have been doing the bloody GP from Mr. Pang. GP really killing me... (any smarter way to conquer GP??? Can suggest to the GP idiot??)

i chatted with Boon Hong (a.k.a.: black chicken 黑鸡), i told him about hostel life... and he said that we hav no life at all... wth... okok... if i were him, i would said that too... but to be honest, i think staying in hostel, being bounded by curfew is not having no life. perhaps, it's juz a matter of discipline. is there any different between staying in hostel or in home.. u will still go back to your house everyday after skol (since u cant afford to hang out anymore), either mug or slack around. but to us, staying in hostel, despite the time set aside for our study time, we do interact with friends in the hostel or have our recreational activities in the field. so, which one of us have no life???

practically, i do agree to a certain extent that we dont really have freedom when we needed, however, this is the most crucial moment in our life-- A level, any waste of time (which most of us usually do) can hav a very profound impact on us... last minute work wont help either!

yup, few more months to go as a hostelite. i'll try to cherish whatever i have here and trust me, u'll hardly get a life like us (those staying in hostel)... so, i feel that it is lucky to hav the chance to experience it! ^^*

Sunday, May 04, 2008

today i was studying in united square, starbucks =)
hmm... i put off my expextation to get to see him(the korean guy) again..
but out of the blue, he appeared beside me.. i was darn excited and happy to see him *^^*
man, i tot he wont come here to study anymore... but he did.. muahahahahaha (evil laugh)

anyway, i met a new friend while studying in Starbucks. he is from west America, a Chinese- indian black American.(i dunno whether i describe the right way.. sorry if i'm not...==") hmm.. he told me that i shld hav some workout and success wont come before hard work. i agreed with him though.. but still my "hardwork" is impeded by my laziness. rargh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i juz tidy my bloody messy room... i dunno why my room will nvr get the way i wanted. honestly, i tried very hard to make it looks the best.. but still... it's in a mess... wtf!!!!!

okay... end my long weekend... still lots of homework waiting for me!! why not juz kill me..Mr. Homework!

Saturday, May 03, 2008

rjc dance performance: Des Annees, 3rd May 2008- was awesome!


it was one of the best dance performance i've ever seen and what impressed me the most is Chinese Dance. chinese dance was simply graceful, elegant and beautiful. i was really mesmerized by the way the chinese dancers curve their body and blast their talents on the stage. chinese dance rocks man!!! trust me ^^*


yea, we then met juli outside the UCC-University Culture Center and took a few pics


jonus, rowland, nalaka, juli, sarvi, arnold
jonus, rowland, nalaka, juli, arnold and me!!!
the gang... =p
hmmm... i just finished SAT reasoning test. hmm... math shld not be a problem to score full points. but when come to english... rargh... juz kill me man!! i hate english... but sometimes, i do like it as it really gives me a lot of knowledge... how paradoxical it is.

oh, and i juz passed Jo a gift. hopefully he'll like it. (wink*)
he'll be leaving tonite.. i'm gonna miss him =(

erm, am going to RJC dance later in NUS. hopefully it'll be a nice one =)

tata.

Friday, May 02, 2008

hmm.. my skol had sports carnival today. i joined eco challenge.. with lihui, marie and Louis (our junior). eco challenge took place in Botanical Garden. though we dint win the game, we really had great time and enjoyed a lot. hey babes, u guys really rocks!!! haha... i love u guys!!

me and lihui inside the Botanical Garden =) nice view huh...

then, i went out with Jo. he is a really nice guy. but leaving singapore for japan tomorrow. dunno why my heart feel so draggy and sad when Sat is approaching... sigh..complicated feelings eh..

oh ya, tml will be sitting SAT. Darn, i'm like unprepare at all... so scary... now, wat i can do is to pray hard... (which i know, praying is no use!!!) so stop blogging and sleep!!! bye!

Thursday, May 01, 2008

okay, i knew i am wrong in the 1st place for wasting so much money.. but cant u guys juz understand me.. i'm a 19year- old- girl, still a teenager, who starts going out with friends, spend money on clothes and shoes.. isnt it normal for a girl?? i juz bought a blouse, a pair of sandals (which i seriously need it), and a bag (on sale) for this term. then u scolded me for spending so much on unecessary stuff and out of anger, u said u're going to burn all my soft toys in my room as they waste space and are really not necessary at all. i'm like:"wat????!!!! am i ur daughter?? do u love me for what i am and care about my stuff???" then u said that u don wan to see me bringing anything back to msia tat i brought from singapore. nothing at all! then i was like:"okay.." i'm speechless...

for god sake, i've been living here since 4 years ago... how can u expect me survive with nothing at all??!! why not say i dont deserve a room back in the house, and juz chase me out. i'm not going back this year.. i really dont hav the sense of belonging. i simply dont feel the bond and family ties...is this what u want afterall, for me to hate the place where people usually refer them as the most comfortable place??

u never trust me in the 1st place... for this reason, it really divides us to distant and we really hav communication gap. i dunno whether i shld make effort anymore to make our father and daughter r/s better... or else, i shld juz keep quiet in term of respecting u?? i think i better keep quiet for any advice or opinions i raised would not be heard by u...and it'll oni strecth us further apart.

when i need u guys the most, u guys are not there for me.. because i know that i'll never get what i want from u guys... and instead, will lost the trust or faith u hav on me..

i might be offensive from what i have written. but this is what my feeling are right now. sometimes, i really wish that i dont exist at all.....